King Konya Moustache Poll
Moustache, Mustache, mostacho, mustaccio, Schnauzbart, Schnäuzer. Are you wondering where this is heading today?
Hold on, my son has mustache underwear and a shirt, that’s it…I swear 😉
I think my hubby thinks that just because you can buy all kinds of mustache decor and clothing now, that it is the must have look. I JUST REALLY HATE IT!
I’m totally getting personal. It’s a silly post but something that is really getting me all emotionally worked up for the past couple of months.
Let me explain myself. My husband decided around our 15th wedding anniversary last May to grow a mustache. Now to some that might be no biggy at all but I hate facial hair and to get even further into detail I hate body hair too. Facial hair to me represents pubic hair on your face. Yup, my dad has always said: “he ripped the lining out during birth”…yeah you heard right! And that’s exactly how I feel. I can’t stand it. Not only is kissing a broom (or what I called it earlier) totally unappealing to me, it makes most people look older. That might be understandable when you are a pubescent teen and you want to show off your first fuzz and how proud you are to finally look older (I hated it back then too though).
(Unless you are Jax Teller, facial hair is a no-no)
Now before you tell me that I am mean once again and shouldn’t discus such matters publicly on my blog. Let me tell you that it baffles me how he can still insist on growing one, when he knows I HATE it that much. If he would tell me that my hair is repulsive (which I have called his stache already) then I would make sure that I’d change it. And every occasion and event we go to, where he has male support, the stupid mustache debate comes up again. That’s when the fist bumps, high fives and “dude that mustache is so cool”, “it’s so Dirk Giggler, man” start flying.
“The guys in my office think it’s awesome honey!”
Ugh, I can’t hear it anymore. Why do you want to loo like a 70s porn star? That’s what one of the dudes told me is so cool about it? Really?
But it’s kinda really seriously IMPORTANT my friends, lol:
And my husband has had a great history of hair issues. If you’ve been following me for a while then you have seen his old photos already but since there are lots of new folks around here, I will fill you in all the way.
(He doesn’t care about me sharing his hair photos, he still, to this day insists that he was a pretty cool guy in highschool”)
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| We are way younger on this photo 😉 as you can tell, duh. Only one child! Number two caused all my wrinkles and gray hair, no joke! |
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| Last year. And I do like a little scruff, but that’s it! |
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NO, no, nooooooo |
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| NO, no, no, no and totally no! |
(The kids and I had a blast even though I don’t look like I did):
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| You aren’t allowed to smile for the app 😉 or it won’t work. |
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| Thanks to bimbo booth app! (That’s not 70s but you can picture me with the mustache guy on my arm, right?) |
Ugh, I have a mental picture of knee high socks and roller blades. Let’s scratch that thought, I might hurt myself. Crackers it is…or maybe the toilet paper will disappear whenever he needs it 😉
Let’s make this fun and give your vote!
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UPDATE: It was a pretty good voting turnout for me. Only a third of the post views voted but that was still several hundred people, well mostly ladies 😉 but that’s good for me.
My husband voted himself by the way and I don’t doubt that he made a buddy or two vote for his stupid mustache.
Here are the results which show that most of you guys are on board with me:
Here is a virtual high five my friends to agreeing that his mustache is not nice looking! He is still in denial and telling me that I probably cheated…blah blah blah…he’s a bad looser!
Tschüß and have a great weekend.
(Youleeya)
Mustaches are a no no… unless you are Tom Selleck or my dad. But that is the only time it’s okay! Funny post! 🙂
I like all over scruff! My husband had about 1/4″ of all-over scruff and I really like it. Of course, he just can’t grow any more facial hair than that, so that’s about as bad as it gets for him 😉
This post cracks me up! I have so much to comment on, but first about your hubby’s terrible 80s hairdo. There is a lot going on there! And also — you are an absolutely gorgeous couple.
No to the ‘stache. I also hate body hair, and I agree with you on all counts – the pubic hair on the face, the terribleness of the 70s porn star look, the injustice of kissing a broom, the aging factor of wearing facial hair. Not to mention why a man would prefer to please his male coworkers over his hot wife who he is (presumably) having sex with? Hmmmm?
Next up – why is it okay for a man to abstain from shaving on vacation? My husband does this for a week every summer and winter, to take a break. I’d love to hear what he would have to say if I decided to do the same thing.
It’s not that great of a mustache and it’s scraggly so no. However, looking at his pictures, he seems to take fashion seriously (yes, horrors of horrors, those haircuts were all stylish at one time) so maybe he’s just rocking the fashion. You can only hope it’s a phase.
Ha. This post is super funny. Maybe he is just growing it to get a rise out of you.
I like his Tarzan looking hair in that first NO mustachio picture holding the pup and the one with you in your hat at the beach. He has that All American boy next door look and the mustachio is just not for him. I totally think he looks fabulous “without” and icky with it. What I do is cringe and say “uck” when my boyfriend decides to grow his facial hair out for a change….. after a few of those as he goes to kiss me and he does not keep it long.
SHAVE IT OFF!! (I said that in the shriekiest voice I could muster). Tell him he should grow one for a cause ever Nov for “Movember” but should otherwise keep his handsome face clean of anything but a little scruff. Seriously – great looking man, but not with that stache!! I am WITH you, friend!
OMG funniest post EVER. i love the mustache on funny humorous things, like pillows and cups and ties. on your hubby- not so much. sorry, king konya, but it’s gotta go! although if he is looking to make some income on the side as a porn star this is perfect so possibly some more revenue? 🙂
and hello you guys are the hottest couple i know. seriously.
Girl, you crack me up! I think King Konya should stick with the scruff. I however love my husbands mustache and goatee, and I get upset when he cuts it off. We are total opposites. Lol. My daughter is into the whole mustache craze. She has mustache shirts and actually wears them. I am currently making something for her room that she would just die over, that happens to be a mustache.
Laughing my ass off! it’s as though Kevin Bacon and Ron Jeremy had a love child. The hubby is just too handsome for a moustache. Sorry King Konya…I side with the wife. Hugs, Amy
omg i just cannot handle mustaches…they say porn star, or perv to me HAH sorry 🙂
Too funny, Julia!! He is so handsome WITHOUT it!! 🙂
Bahahaha..this post had me DYING! And you guys are such a hot couple!!! Of course, ONLY when he has NO mustache!
SHAVE IT OFF!
You have a hot hubby! But the stash takes him from a 10 to a 4. At least it’ll keep other gals at bay, so look on the bright side. I didn’t think I’d like facial hair but my husband decided to grow a beard (not a long gross one) and it looks amazing on him.
That’s a great way to look at it 😉
I actually think the beard isn’t as bad as the mustache! The mustache has a pervert label like someone else already said!
Julia, this post is hilarious!!! I agree that the mustache is a no-go. But historically, I have not had success in changing my husband’s mind on any fashion choices. He grew his curly, crazy clown hair out for a year once and I was powerless to stop it. It was SO BAD, but he wouldn’t listen to me – he tried to make a deal where I had to stop wearing makeup entirely (he dislikes it, for some reason) in order for him to cut his hair. Of course that wasn’t going to happen! I wish you much MUCH better luck on the get-rid-of-the-mustache campaign!!
This post made me laugh today! I can’t stand the current mustache design trend OR real ones, either!
Word! Don’t get it.
So, so funny! Great post!
OMG! Such a good looking man, and such an UGLY mustache. Yuck. I don’t understand it…he still has to shave every day, so what’s the point of that thing?
My point exactly!
Omg…I’m dying from laughter…that picture of your hubby from the 80’s is so awesome…oh…my stomach hurts from laughing!!! I so wish I could have heard him describing to his hair dresser what he wanted. A bowl cut + a mohawk + high and tight on the sides with some radical lines. Too funny. I totally agree with you, though, unless your name is Jax…just don’t try the facial hair. And let’s face it, your hubby is a good looking dude (I would say hot, but I don’t want to be that creepy gal). My vote is go back to the nearly shaved head. Hello…super cute!!! No facial hair…shave that sucker off!
You are killing me!!! This is hilarious 🙂 And I HATE the stache! He is SO much more handsome without it. I am on your team 100%!!!
LOL! DH grows a beard every November and then shaves it off usually early spring, just when I start to get used to it. But just a mustache? definitely no. I was worried you were going in a different direction with this post; I am so over the mustache trend and have been since it started!
This post is hilarious! I am also not a fan of the “molest”stache. Without it he is very cute.
I’m so glad I’m getting support! LOL
Definitely NO to the scraggly mustache. My husband knows you can have kisses or a mustache but you can’t have both, I hate them .
Haha, that’s a good one!
Such an entertaining post, Julia! It gave me a good laugh. I was actually talking to a friend a few days ago, discussing the whole mustache thing and agreeing that very few men can actually get away with having one. I vote no. (Sorry, King Konya! Although, I dig your 80’s do!)
Hahahahaha. That was the funniest thing ever. I have to agree with you. I think I would go on some sort of strike if my dh ever decided to grow a mustache. Blech. Big fat no from me too 🙂
ha!ha! Please, please shave it ha!ha! 🙂
hubby can’t grow facial hair and doesn’t have much body hair either (thank god for that) but now, he’s not shaving the small hair spots that are growing in his face (3 months) I hate it, I want him to shave it and he just wont, so I read him your email and he says that your husband shouldn’t shave his mustache 🙂 oh! man, they will always agree with each other ha!ha! hope you are having a great weekend Julia 🙂 btw, hubby wants to vote, so you might get 2 votes from my computer 🙂
This was really fun to read! In Sweden we usually joke that all German men have mustaches (don’t really know why, but I’ve seen a LOT of them travelling in Germany).
Maybe your husband is trying to look more “Lohr-am-Main-ish”?
LOL, that’s a good one! You are right, there are a lot of “strange” German men with mustaches!
Oh Julia! I am actually LOL’ing over here. I’m not a mustache person at all. I’ve always wanted Nick to be clean shaven, but lately I’ve like the trimmed beard he’s working.
I know you already have the results but I just couldn’t resist giving you a big H to the ELL no. Nothing against your hubby, I just HATE mustaches. Movember (aside from the great cancer awareness part) is the worst thing ever! Thank goodness my hubby can’t grow enough to really have one.
I dont like moustaches too. They prick you all the time..
You guys are such a cute couple in that younger pic wow!!
Thank you!
I am sooo late to this party, but the whole post made me crack up. Mostly because I’m in the same boat. Thankfully the beau doesn’t intentionally grow one. He just forgets to shave, to which I refuse kisses. Kissing sandpaper is not fun. ever. Get the memo dudes.
I think it was my husband’s odd midlife crisis to have a stupid mustache. The two reader comments in the poll were one person said he looked like Ron Jeremy and Kevin Bacon’s love child and the other one where someone said he looked like Freddy Mercury and then asked where his chaps are ruined it for him. FINALLY! Public shaming worked!
Oh my….I realize this post is an oldie, but I had to thank you for the laugh. Funny stuff. And I agree: Just say NO! to the stache! Beautiful photo of the two of you, btw.